gibberish


Holocaust nonsense
November 30, 2007, 8:43 pm
Filed under: life, photography, politics, Rants | Tags: , , , , ,

I was sent an email today that claimed lessons about the Holocaust have been removed from the UK’s school history syllabus in case it offends Muslims who are in denial about its existence.

First of all I find it incredible that an entire religious body could deny a plain historical fact. Can this really be so?

And secondly, why on earth would the British Government endorse this sick and disgusting show of weakness to a minority pressure group. If that is what you’d call the entire Muslim community.

It certainly resonates with the current trend to avoid confronting or challenging minority opinion in case it offends people.  But to go this far, to run away from the truth, if indeed we are makes me very sad indeed.

In fact, if it is true then I am appalled.

Perhaps these photos were staged?

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SQA Art exhibition
November 30, 2007, 7:51 pm
Filed under: Arts, Scotland | Tags: , , , , , ,

The SQA is to be congratulated for mounting an exhibition, in the RSA no less, of A grade artworks by Scottish Schoolchildren sitting Standard, Int 2 and higher grade art.

I saw it on wednesday and it is brilliant and must be seen.

Here’s a taster by Steven Mcarthur of Williamwood High School.

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ten decades of edinburgh art college
November 30, 2007, 10:48 am
Filed under: Arts, photography, videos, work | Tags: , , ,

My friend Terry and I went to an exhibition celebrating ten decades of Edinburgh Art College at the City Art Centre in Edinburgh on Wednesday. The show features works from some of the colleges best known alumni including Bellany, Byrne, Inness, Blackadder and Peploe to name but a few.

But it this piece of haunting animation by a young American?italian, Josef Feltus and his brother that stole the show for me.

The Simpsons it aint but stick with it. It is beautiful and won the Jim Poole award, amongst many others, last year.

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McGlashan
November 28, 2007, 7:57 pm
Filed under: humour, independence, life, Scotland, videos | Tags: ,

My Brother in law enjoyed the diatribe by McGlashen about the unfairness of world cup draws.

but he has nominated this gem of Xenophobia as his favourite.

Don’t blame me.  I’m the medium.  Not the message.

]



olbas man
November 28, 2007, 7:04 pm
Filed under: life, photography, work | Tags: ,


Seen at Waverley Station this morning.

So what do you do for a living?
I dress up as a snotter-free nose.
Nice



What my dad would have loved.
November 27, 2007, 11:05 pm
Filed under: dad, family, humour, jokes, life, photography

This is what. Read all the comments here and follow the links.

Right up his street.

Good old James!

It’s basically the classic “Someone taking a photo of someone taking a photo routine” which my dad loved so much.



no picnic?
November 26, 2007, 11:13 pm
Filed under: photography, Scotland | Tags: , ,

Of course it’s a picnic. It’s Gleneagles.



78 at The Queens today
November 26, 2007, 9:25 pm
Filed under: family, golf, Scotland, sports, stories | Tags: ,

 

insland-of-the-queens-wee.jpg

44 out.

34 back.

Tom was crushed, but happy for me.

Home run was 4 4 3 4 4 4 3 4 4.

6 pars, 2 bogies and a birdie.

Back of the net.

A net 60 to the course par of 68.

I was happy.



Sky plus
November 26, 2007, 9:22 pm
Filed under: family, humour, life, tv | Tags:

A new system is arriving on Saturday.

That’s the 12th.

Jeana screaming down the phone “I’d like to speak to someone who understands what I am saying” over and over again was priceless.

That’s our twelfth box in under a year. (And another free month. Our fourth I think.)

Does anyone have Norris McWhirter’s phone number?



Old Sea Dog.
November 26, 2007, 9:18 pm
Filed under: life, photography | Tags: , ,

Old Sea Dog.

Originally uploaded by jimbodownie.

Jim Downie at his greatest. Is this not a peerless and perfect photograph?



Vapour trail in Manchester
November 26, 2007, 9:05 pm
Filed under: photography, work | Tags: , ,



Kinda like this shot I took in Manchester two weeks ago.



Scotland win world cup
November 25, 2007, 10:24 pm
Filed under: family, golf, humour, life, Scotland, sports, stories | Tags: , , , ,

Go on yersel’ Monty. (And Marky boy, of course.)

Scottish golf has had such a bad year that it would be fair to say that my personal emergence from the woods to become a credible 18 handicapper has been one of the Scottish Golf Union’s highlights.

So today’s golf world cup win (as predicted by Monty) was not universally expected.

What was even less credible was that I spotted Dougie Donnelly at Gleneagles this afternoon and whispered the fact across the table to Jeana.

She was astonished.

“Colin Montgomery?” she whispered in a tone below the one that dogs can hear.

“Yes.”

(“The guy you snogged in 1988?” I must have subconsciously thought, seeing as I really thought she had said “Dougie Donnelly?)

“It doesn’t look like him”, she replied

Naturally it didn’t because a) it wasn’t and b) it was Dougie Donnelly and c) Dougie Donnelly doesn’t look like a bulldog licking piss off a nettle.

Judge for yourselves…

Monty?

monty.jpg

Or Dougie?

speakoutdougiedonnelly1.jpg

Spitting images?

OK, they’re both gingers, like the Mrs, but how could Monty be relaxed at Gleneagles at the same time as he’s lifting the cup in China?

For the record, Jeana was at a corporate do in 1988 and Dougie was the compere. In a moment of weakness Jeana shreiked across the dance floor “Dougie, gie us a kiss.”

And you know what?

He did.



There will be blood
November 25, 2007, 7:51 pm
Filed under: Arts, movies | Tags: , , ,

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PT Anderson is currently the world’s most gifted film-maker.

Fact!

Boogie Nights, Magnolaia and Punch Drunk Love are each brilliant in different ways. His new movie “There will be blood” breaks in the US at Christmas and in the UK on Feb 8th. (I will be there on opening night.)

It is garnering feverish reviews as this punter blog on IMDB shows.

PT Anderson delivers perhaps his best work with “There Will Be Blood”. Unlike “Magnolia”, the film’s daunting runtime is not very daunting whilst watching it. All acting in the film was solid, even the work of the child actors. Daniel Day-Lewis in particular delivered a truly phenomenal performance, capturing the power of greed, fear, insanity, and comedy simultaneously, at many points throughout the film. At no point does the time period distract from the power of the film. Sometimes period pieces cannot be appreciated because they delve too deep into historical details — turning the experience into more of a documentary than a narrative set in the past. This is not the case for “There Will Be Blood”, as human interactions are the focus of the film. Johnny Greenwood’s chilling score is very strong, benefiting from the elegant minimalism that he show’s in the band Radiohead. Will this picture go on to win Best Picture? It absolutely has every right to, however I feel that this movie is a bit ahead of current trends in modern cinema, and will sadly go unnoticed for that particular Oscar. I’m certain that this film will garner many accolades in the independent and film festival scenes. All in all, this is truly a perfectly crafted film.

Apparently Daniel Day Lewis is, once again, peerless and fully method-acted throughout.  (Although, to be honest I thought his portrayal of Billy Blood; the butcher in Gangs of New York was over the top.)

daniel-day-lewid.jpg

If you haven’t seen any of his previous films see them on DVD now.

They are ALL masterpieces.



Steve Mclaren vilification
November 23, 2007, 8:59 pm
Filed under: football, life | Tags: , ,

He was not a great manager. But being treated like the antichrist is totally out of order though and I think this is a very intelligent blog post to that end.

http://almax.wordpress.com/2007/11/21/england-2-3-croatia-revisited/



doggone it…

 

 

A football-playing dog has had a leg amputated after being mown down by a speeding hit-and-run driver.

Footie-daft Collie-cross, Sox, was walking with his owner, Jose Mourhinho, when the car appeared from nowhere and knocked the pooch down.

 

The heartless driver refused to stop, leaving the helpless dog in the middle of the road.

 

Now, after making an amazing recovery, the three-legged animal still runs rings round his owner on the football pitch.

 

The incident happened outside Wembley Stadium and FA Management were completely amazed by it.

 

The pooch hasn’t let a missing paw stop him doing what he loves the most – playing football in the park and fully anticipates an England call up for World Cup 2010 in South Africa.

 

Sox Said “Woof, woof woof woo woohoo woofy woof woof fart woofy woof woof” Which Mourhino, used to translating a lot of total crap, said meant. “It’s really annoying because I was in talks with Steve Mclaren and I was close to a call up until broody Wensday. Looking at that lot I had a 50/60 cap career ahead of me. I’m going to have to miss out on the first few ‘cos they’ve not got through. To be honest mate I’m fucking gutted. Gutted. Really, really fucking gutted.”


This is Sox before his accident, so you can see for yourself it’s all true.

]

 

 



Absolutely genius

I am indebted to James McLaughlin for bringing this wee gem to my attention.  Too true.

]



sky plus
November 22, 2007, 12:25 am
Filed under: Rants, tv | Tags:

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Aye they’re having a laugh right enough.

What part of Sky Plus is the + bit?

Is it the increased number of technical call-outs I wonder?

As I write this our 12th box (that’s twelfth) has gone up the spout and we’ve only had it for 11 months.  That’s 12 call outs, 24 phone calls and 12 different contractors; all of whom have had a different story to tell, but all of whom agree that the Sky plus Digi box is a piece of technical dog poo.

Oh, and contrary to what they say, whether Amstrad, Thomson, Pace or bloody Playschool make them they don’t work.

Bet nobody can beat that.



The pontani sisters
November 22, 2007, 12:16 am
Filed under: Arts, family | Tags: , , , ,

Jane and Nik are off to New York this week and are meeing up with The Pontani sisters; The US’ number one burlesque act.

pontani-sisters.jpg

I bet Nik’s really hackeed off about it!

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We’ve gone on holiday
November 18, 2007, 10:36 pm
Filed under: family, golf, life, Scotland

For the next week, Jeana and I will be staying at our “seasonal ownership” house at Gleneagles.

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It’s actually a timeshare.

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If you happen to be a burglar reading this, the rest of the family will be slumming it at home; so back off you thief.

Hmmm, shame about the weather forecast.

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The nation awaits
November 17, 2007, 3:41 pm
Filed under: football, photography, Scotland, sports

And The Record runs its best ever cover.

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Come on Scotland!



It’s a snip
November 17, 2007, 1:13 pm
Filed under: advertising, work

In a time where labour saving electric shredders are readily available for under a tenner.

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How many cats can one town lose?
November 16, 2007, 11:57 pm
Filed under: life, photography, Scotland | Tags: , , ,

The station entrance at Dalmeny is awash with lost cat posters.

ost-cats.jpg

Here kitty, kitty, kitty…

It’s a ‘catalogue’ of disasters.

What on earth would I KAN HAS CHEEZEBURGER (the world’s worst blog) have to say about it.



Cometh the hour. Cometh the man. Are you ready?

]



Thai Crispy Belly of Pork
November 12, 2007, 10:08 pm
Filed under: food, Restaurant reviews, work | Tags: , ,

Tony Harding told me I would have the finest meal of my life in a Thai restaurant in Manchester, where I am working just now.  It was pretty nice but Dusit in Thistle Street kicks its arse.



6 day riot
November 12, 2007, 12:15 am
Filed under: music, photography | Tags: , , ,

Saw them at The Playhouse last night supporting Deacon Blue.

Very good.



That’s my girl
November 11, 2007, 6:52 pm
Filed under: family, photography | Tags:

ria.jpg



That’s my boy
November 11, 2007, 6:26 pm
Filed under: family, golf, life, photography, sports

Tom has won eight golf competitions this year and his handicap has dropped from 28 to 21 so today was the prizegiveing at Ratho Park.  We marked the moment on film.

(Of course it’s not so much that he played well as the fantastic coaching he gets!  Modesty does not permit me to reveal the name of his Paternal coach.)

tom-trophies.jpg



When advertising was less strictly conrolled…
November 10, 2007, 8:08 pm
Filed under: advertising, Arts, work

You could run demonstration ads that were a little more…daring.

baby-shave-2.jpg



Scott Brown tackle
November 10, 2007, 12:06 pm
Filed under: football, life, Rants, Scotland, sports | Tags: , ,

I think this is the worst and most disgusting tackle I have ever seen. The guy should be banned for life. How on earth Scotty got up is beyond me. And in his interview it’s like, whatever!

]

Postscript. The Portugese Eejit got a six match ban. reasonable justice I’d say.



female logic
November 10, 2007, 11:07 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

As I got out of bed this morning my wife asked me if I was going to put underpants on.  In case the Sky man comes.

No, I didn’t understand it either.




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