Filed under: Arts, creativity, golf, life, photography, sports, videos | Tags: JP Auclair, LCD soundsystem, Ski video
OK, so I don’t DO ski.
But one can’t help but admire excellence in other fields.
Check out this video then by JP Auclair. It won a bunch of prizes at ski film awards for his LCD Soundsystem video.
The bit I love most is the sparks flying as the skis hit gravel.
Reminds me of driving on the golf course at dusk when the titanium sole plate of the driver catches grit on the Tee.
Filed under: advertising, Arts, books, business, creativity, family, gigs, golf, humour, life, movies, photography, Scotland, stories, theatre, tv, videos, work | Tags: 2011, 2011 in hindsight, best of 2011, gibberish, mark gorman, review iof 2011
2011 was rather less fraught than 2010. I didn’t work to such ridiculous extremes, and the year end saw my portfolio change quite considerably compared to 12 months ago. Three big new clients at year end were Maidsafe, Vets2 and Front Page Design, all autumnal starters and all brilliant to work with. My STV contract finally came to an end after three years but its been great and I am very grateful to them for all the work.
Some old troopers still stand by me; 60 Watt, Paligap, The Usability Lab, Corporation Pop, Ampersand and LA Media, with occassional work from a small number of others.
To you all; slainte and have a great 2012.
If my golf was bad in 2010 it beggared belief in 2011. I gave up my membership at Dundas Park and clearly that did not have a galvanising effect on my game. I was shit awful on both trips of the year and even my winter game has been poor.
We didn’t go away as a family in 2011, for a variety of reasons but I had the holiday (maybe an exaggeration to call it that) of a lifetime in June when Ria and I went to Glastonbury. To say it was memorable would be something of an understatement. There is one abiding memory of it, I have to say…the bogs.
But there were other memorable sights and moments, like this…
And this…
Which brings me onto my musical highlights of the year.
My best of CD which you can have if you like included these tracks…
In a good year for music my song of the year, without question, was Video Games by Lana Del Rey.
My albums of the year were;
Bad as Me by Tom Waits (overall my favourite record)
Let England Shake by PJ Harvey
You and I by The Pierces
The English Riviera by Metronomy
A creature I don’t know by Laura Marling
50 Words for Snow by Kate Bush
Hotel Shampoo by Gruff Rhyss
Build a Rocket Boys by Elbow who also performed the gig of the year at Glastonbury (closely followed by King Creosote at The Liquid Rooms)
A different Kind of Love by Bombay Bicycle Club
21 by Adele
I did a lot of cinema in 2011…
Here’s what I thought of what I saw in my IMDB profile…
Two ten out of tens and a few nines show that it was also a good year for movies. In retrospect I plump for three as my best of the year
Senna
A Separation and
Drive.
On TV This is England 2008 moved me to tears and was by far the year’s greatest offering. I liked Top Boy too.
I didn’t read a great deal this year but have really enjoyed
The Brothers Sisters by Patrick DeWitt.
The Childrens Hospital by Chris Adrtian.
And Filthy English, The How, Why When and What of Everyday Swearing by Pete Silverton.
But the best read of the year by far was…The Guardian which I grow deeper in love with.
This was a big year of theatre for me. I reckon I saw at least 20 different productions but easily the stand out was Dance Marathon in which Jeana and I and Chris and Liam danced our asses off for five hours before I was told I was relentless by the Producer. We also had amazing nights at The Kings for James Cordon in One Man, Two Guvnors and The Lyceum for both Dunsinane and Age of Arousal.
This year was sadly marked by way too much illness among our friends for me to want to dwell on but Matt, David and Jenny I am thinking of you now.
Also, we lost James King, Joyce Cambell and Fiona Pirie from FCT and Rachel Appolinari at the outrageous age of 19. RIP all of you. xxx
All of the family have blossomed in the past year, thank God, and long may it continue. In particular Amy has shown an almost exponential growth in confidence and skills in many different areas.
2012 is University year for Tom and Ria should they both choose to go down that path.
And so, to 2012. It’s the year I turn 50, Amy 21, Tom and Ria 18 and I aim, with Pete the Meat, to lose at least 50 pounds each before we turn 50 in May. We are raising money to do so and you’ll soon hear of our plans.
Thanks for being my reader once again in 2011. My year end Technorati rating was an all time high closing in on a top 1% of all the blogs in the world rating.
16,000th out of 1.2 million.
Filed under: golf, Scotland, sports, stories | Tags: andalucian open, Bay Hill Invitational, European tour, Malaga, Martin Laird, orlando Florida, Paul Lawrie, pga, tiger woods, US golf tour, USPGA
Orlando California Yesterday
All that stood between Martin Laird and victory at Bay Hill were two putts from just inside 90 feet on the 18th hole, which didn’t seem all that long considering what he already had been through Sunday.
First came a stunning collapse that took him from a three-shot lead to a three-shot deficit in a span of seven holes. He was three shots behind when he walked off the 14th green, two shots ahead as he headed to the 17th tee.
Laird knocked the first putt up to 3 feet, then jabbed his fist when he rolled in the par putt to win the Arnold Palmer Invitational.
Malaga, Spain , Yesterday
The 42-year-old former British Open champion [Paul Lawrie] took the Andalucian Open by one over Sweden’s Johan Edfors.
With six runner-up finishes since his last victory, Lawrie must have feared it was going to be another near miss when, from one ahead overnight, he bogeyed the first two holes Sunday and England’s Mark Foster birdied them.
But, in a repeat of what happened at last year’s Spanish Open, Foster could not hold onto a three-shot lead.
Lawrie, despite dropping another stroke at the fifth, turned things round by starting the back nine with four birdies in five holes. And the Aberdeen golfer, whose world ranking has dropped from 29th in 2000 to 272nd, could even afford a closing bogey to win with a level-par 70 and 12-under total of 268.
“It’s been a long time — 2002 seems a hell of a time ago,” he said. “I’ve had a few second places in there, but all of a sudden we’re there again.
Hats off to the boys.
It must be the first time ever that Scots have triumphed in the European and US tours on the same day.
It should be noted that The Bay Hill is no Micky Mouse Tournament (even though it’s played in Orlando). Tiger Woods has won it six times!
Filed under: family, golf, Scotland | Tags: golf handicaps, Linlithgow driving range., ratho park, tom gorman
Amazingly Tom went round Ratho in Three over par (72) this morning and one under (68) this afternoon (both in Junior medals) which means his handicap has been cut over the course of this week from 10 to 6! He’s been threatening this for weeks but hasn’t happened, however his recent lesson at the excellent driving range at Linlithgow must have played a part.
Very proud!
I’ve creamed a drive, smacked a sweet 3 wood to 70 yards and stand with a pitching wedge on the 2nd fairway at Dundas. “Nice shot” my opponent shouts as I nip a sweet little wedge greenwards. Two bounces and it drop off the pin into the hole. After 35 years of waiting I finally shoot my first ever eagle. I was pleased. Ross my opponent high fives me and I go two up.
Two holes later, despite playing to five under my handicap I’m only one up. and at the turn it’s all square. Then I lose 10, 11, 12 and 13. Four down with five to play. But I dig deep and win 14and 15. Disaster awaits on the 16th tee though and a hooked drive leads to a five. It’s all over. All I have to remember this round by is that elusive eagle. But it’s a sweet one.
When I saw Tom at home I asked him. “How’d you play son?’
“Crap, but I eagled the first.”
Whatever. He’s had about 10.
Filed under: family, golf, humour, jokes, life, Scotland, sports, stories | Tags: Club championship, crap golfers, golf clubs, Jon and Chris Rough

My score is in the most left hand column. I’ve scored better. But it’s matchlay and it’s the winning that counts.
Tonight I, the worst player at Dundas parks Golf Club, stood aside my opponent on the first tee, for my first round match in the club championships.
A lack of confidence did not pervade my opponent’s frame.
Me? I have come last, stone last, in medals at Dundas Parks more often than any player in the club’s history.
I am officially. A joke.
Not only that.
I am temperamental.
I lose heart easily.
And I am disappointing in many, many ways.
But my chums support me (especially the Rough Bros). Good guys who just think it’s funny and know that I throw up the odd surprise.
Cue tonight.
My opponent, with a higher handicap than mine (I know, it’s hard to believe) probably knew how rubbish I am.
But in a Dodgeball way I pulled it together. But so did he. He played to his handicap. So I had to play under mine to undermine him. Two under as it happens.
I won.
I am legend.
As Tom would say “I am Ninja.” He was genuinely chuffed and that meant a lot.
Filed under: advertising, golf, sports | Tags: earl woods ad, Earl woods Nike ad, Tiger, tiger and earl woods ad, tiger woods, tiger woods ad, tiger woods Nike ad
But I have never seen claptrap like this before.
It sucks.
It’s so confusing that I can’t decide if it’s offensive, extraordinarily egotistical, on-brand, off-brand, motivating, purely confessional.
It is beyond bad.
Yup. It sucks.
Filed under: advertising, Arts, books, business, family, football, golf, Hibees, humour, life, music, politics, Rants, Scotland, sports, stories, videos, work, Youtube | Tags: 2010
And so the noughties come to a close…
2009 was a funny old year in many ways.
Work wise I’ve never been busier and gained some fascinating new clients along the way not least STV, Ampersand, Corporation Pop and LA Media. But for some it has been a hell of a struggle and I hope things improve in 2010. My own prospects for 2010 look a bit less silly than 2009. Might even get some golf in. Only played three medals in 2009 but following my FIRST EVER golf lesson in November I went on to finish second. Yes, you heard that right, second in a winter medal and now sit proudly in 5th place overall in the winter league order of merit. Just shows you that you can teach an old dog new tricks.
It was a mare of a year music wise. I’ve already posted my tracks of the year elsewhere but I really struggled to pull together my top ten albums, so much so that I had to go into rereleases to make up the ten. Nevertheless, those that made it are great records in this or any year, there just weren’t many of them.
These are they;
The Phantom Band. Checkmate Savage.
The year started brightly with this oddball Krautrock-influenced Rock and Roll album from what sounds like a bunch of stoners from Glasgow. It’s great. And I notice that this video from the album is directed by Martin Wedderburn (who I’ve worked with on commercials and Bronagh Keegan! Who used to work for me at 1576. Not to mention Ray Allan as a Barman and some Tetrahedron masks.)
Melody Gardot. My One and Only Thrill.
Her first album showed promise, but her second is solid gold jazz and my personal achievement of the year was plucking up the courage to sing My One And Only Thrill from the record at the FAT concert on December 19th.
Doves. Kingdom of Rust.
This year’s Elbow? I suppose so, but this is to underestimate the quality of this beautiful, haunting and melodic rock record with real soul.
EG. Adventure Man.
Why does this man (Eg White – silly name I know) not have a higher profile? He writes many of Britain’s best pop songs (Chasing Pavements, Warwick Avenue, songs for Pink, James Morrison, Take That, Beverley Knight, Kylie Minogue, Will Young etc) . He’s current songwriter of the year and nobody has heard of him. This is only his third album in two decades and it is astounding. Pure wondrous pop. Check him out please.
Bill Callahan. Sometimes I wish we were an eagle.
He was in Smog. He WAS Smog. (So what. Nobody knows Smog either. Ed.) This album came from nowhere from my point of view so thanks to Ian Dommett for introducing it to me. It’s a wee bit like Lambchop from a vocal perspective but the music is way, way different. Trust me on this one.
The XX. The XX.
A quite extraordinary debut. Sounding like a cross between Young Marble Giants and The Cocteau twins, but nothing like either, this was surely the debut of the year. Electrifying and beautiful. Self produced too. Not bad for a bunch of teenagers. Interesting to see what happens next time round. This video has already had 1.7m hits on youtube so clearly they are hitting a few people’s buttons.
Andrew Bird. Noble Beast.
A multi instrumentalist from the states. This is his 5th album and I’d missed them all before. I will be catching up next year.
The Mummers. Tale to tell.
I saw March of The Dawn on Jools and was immediately blown away (that’s also where I discovered the XX). The rest of the album hangs together well but this is the stand out track for sure.
Yeah Yeah Yeahs. It’s Blitz.
Truth to tell I’ve not played this album that much, but it’s a great slice of arthouse rock and roll. The critics loved it. It only got into my top ten by the skin of its teeth though.
Kraftwerk. Radioactivity, Computer Love and Trans Europe Express.
The re-release of Kraftwerk’s entire back catalogue fully remastered was the music event of the year. This band’s influence never wanes. But it’s clear they had a golden period with the three albums above taking my personal plaudits. All of them pure 5 star and all quite different. I think Radioactivity is my favourite.
Although all of the following met with critical acclaim I’m cool on them; Noah and The Whale, Paulo Nuttini (Although this would probably win the family’s album of the year overall on default – Ria and Jeana loved it and Tom and I were OK with it), Pete Doherty, (back to being a wanker again I see – is that ‘cos nobody bought his so so album) even Graham Coxon’s latest wasn’t that brilliant.
Martha Wainwright’s Edith Piaf record is good but not great, the God Help the Girl album was not good at all (I think Stuart Murdoch is missing the influence of his muse).
Time may show that I have overlooked the Animal Collective’s interesting album but I’m not so sure – a bit like TV on the Radio, the critics love it bus is it actually any good.
My blog has hit 296,000 views in the year which is 40,000 down on 2008 and perhaps reflects fewer posts (only 385 in total). Or maybe it’s just shit now. Still I think it’s a respectable total and thanks for your comments but I’d still like more contributions telling me when I’m being a tosser. Especially you Iain as you regularly tell me offline.
The Hibees came back with a vengeance under the coaching of Yogi Hughes but the defeat to Rangers last week suggests a glass ceiling has been well and truly hit. But there is some hope AGAIN for the cup.
Our clubs in Europe were pitiful and my lowlight in that respect was Falkirk (population 34,000) going out to a team from the mighty Lichtenstein – population 35,000 – that’s the country, not the town the team comes from. Liechtenstein is so small it doesn’t even have a league.
Theatre played a big part in my year. Apart from as an audience member.
I enjoyed Confined Human Condition by Cryptic and The Last Witch during the festival (although it was a bit overrated). My role as a director of The Lyceum developed and I thought the production of Memoirs of a Justified Sinner was the highlight of the year. Truly awesome. But nothing was to match the impact of Ragtime during the festival in which Ria joined the ranks brilliantly and Ya Beauty which was an experience I will never forget. My dad would have had “the tingles” for months.
Amy did brilliantly at school and finally nailed her English which gives her a great bunch of results to pursue her further education later this year. In the meantime she’s doing great working full time at Dakota and having passed her driving test has her own transport (a rather beaten up Fiat Punto but it works, mostly). Sadly Stuart moved away to Port Knockie so we ain’t seen so much of him.
Tom’s golf continued to improve and his handicap went from 15 to 11. He won two medals and The Greenkeepers Trophy and competed regularly for the team which is an achievement as it’s probably Ratho’s best ever junior team. We went to watch but that ended in tears. A lot of the older guys leave for next year so interesting times. He also got into the Dunfermline Masters for the second year running.
He and Ria both have their Standard Grades this year and both got credits (in Tom’s case on appeal) in their English this year.
That particular subject has caused some grief as it is clear that Tom and Ria take rather different views on the importance of studying. But I’ll not go into that here.
Ria substituted gymnastics for drama and I think she enjoys it much more as she has made a great new bunch of pals at FCT and is in her second show this Easter (Just So based on The Rudyard Kipling stories. Watch this space.). Ria is working like a trooper and had brilliant results in her prelims. And she’s got a fella! He’s not had the Gorman grilling yet. But there is time for that.
Jeana’s work at Suntrap has blossomed (pun intended) and she loves it. She managed two open days this year to great success. Aided and abetted by her blog which you can find here . It has steadily grown and is now pulling in 10,000 views a month. She provided Tom and I with our comedy moment of the year when she slipped in Alvor during the summer holidays and cut her knee. The slip was a true Laurel and Hardy moment as she careered down a cobbled street on her knees. Tom and I wet ourselves but that was THE WRONG THING TO DO, and we were punished accordingly. Needless to say Ria was a tower of strength to Jeana in this moment of humiliation. Tom and I still laugh about it.
We apologise. Sorry Jeana.
However Alvor did give us our funniest collective moment of the year as you will see from this video which we shot in the town square in Alvor. It was the local orchestra playing and this wee bloke at the back had only one job which he executed with lack of enthusiasm but not a great deal of ability as will be revealed. We enjoyed it immensely as you will hear.
I also discovered the old 1576 promo videos that we created many years ago. Not a good idea.
In books only one really stands out in a disappointing year. I just didn’t have time. This is astounding.
But I enjoyed this too…
And my movie of the year? I got to see a lot of great movies this year and the ones that really stood out were; the Hurt Locker, Harry Brown, The White Ribbon, Sherlock Holmes, Looking For Eric and Drag Me to Hell but the best for me was a TV documentary/movie of epic proportions made by the History Channel.
TV show of the year? No Question. True Blood.
Digital gizmo of the year? Again. no question. Spotify. But Facebook make a major ressurgence. So much so that Jeana complained at one point that I was neglecting the blog. Yeah, right enough. Only 380 posts!. Twitter continues to not flick my switch but I persevere.
My man of 2008, was Yogi Hughes.
Idiot of the Year? Kenny Macaskill for doing a Tony Bliar [sic] on us about Magrahi.
Best party was the Yah Beauty wrap, followed closely by the Ragtime wrap.
Wife of the year? Jeana Gorman. 20th year running.
Put it this way. I couldn’t live with me. Still.
And so to 2010.
My hopes?
Hibees win the Scottish Cup. (You say that every year. Ed.)
Tom gets down to a 7 handicap.
I win something, anything, at Dundas Park
Amy gets into Uni.
I am healthy throughout.
Both Cath and Jean stay healthy too.
Tom and Ria do well in their exams.
The credit crunch doesn’t get worse again.
Filed under: golf, life, photography, Scotland, sports, stories | Tags: at Gleneagles, deer, Gleneagles, golf course, The Queens Course, wildlife
I’ve played twice on The Queesn Course at Gleneagles so far this week. Both times against my Glenmor neighbour and friend, David Low. He’s been for lessons because we’ve had two right good scraps so far. and he is unbeaten. Yesterday I took it to the 18th before losing a ball on my drive. Today though I came back from 3 down to sink a par putt on the 18th to half the match.
He was delighted!
My score improved by ten strokes in much better weather this morning and I shot a nett 69 which I was pretty pleased with.
But the storm clouds are gathering and the rest of the week looks a bit unsettled, certainly for golf.
We saw a Buzzard (I think) yesterday and two deer were right in front of us on a sodden, but still frosty, first fairway at 8.15 this morning.
Filed under: golf, life, sports, stories | Tags: dundas parks, golf, winter golf, winter league
It’s been a long time coming. But I finally posted a sub par score. Six under par in fact and when I left the course I was lying second overall by one point, having missed a birdie putt from five feet on the 17th.
The fact is, I had a lesson three weeks ago and it corrected my grip which meant I drove better than ever before in my life.
But all credit to Chris Rough – one of my playing partners. I was six ahead of him after four holes but he then shot nine (net) birdies in the remaining 14 holes to lead by one on 43 points.
\
Filed under: golf, Scotland, sports, stories | Tags: british womens open, Catriona Matthew, golf in scotland, Scottish Golf, womens open

Thank you Lord for Catriona Matthew.
Finally Scotland has some dignity on the world golf stage.
We should dominate this game (don’t get me startyed on footie) but we are a national enigma.
Matthews’ win in the British Women’s Open at the Weekend at Lytham St Anne’s is something to celebrate then.
And the back story is quality.
A three month old baby. And a fire rescue a couple of weeks ago as her house and most of its possessions went up in smoke in France.
She’s a hero.
Thanks Cat.
Filed under: advertising, Arts, business, golf, humour, jokes, life, Scotland, sports, stories, videos, Youtube
Good work guys. Lovely spoof of the Tiger Woods Nike Commercial.
And here’s the original in case you haven’t seen it. A masterpiece.

Played Tom at the Golf tonight.
The heavens opened after 13 holes and we had to abandon. But it was certainly interesting. He was three up after four. It was all square at the turn and I was three up at the conclusion. We called it an honourable draw. Tee hee hee.
Filed under: advertising, Arts, books, business, family, football, gardening, golf, Hibees, humour, Jeana's Gardening, jokes, life, movies, music, photography, politics, science, Scotland, sports, stories, theatre, tv, work | Tags: 1576, 2008, 60 watt, adrian jeffery, amadou and mariam, david reid, did lazarus dig, Ferry Fringe, Golley Slater, Graphic Partners, greenferry, Hibees, Hunger, mighty small, national theatre of Scotland, no country for old men, Poppyscotland, snailbooty, spider online., Story, stv, Suntrap Garden, the black watch, The lyceum Theatre, Traverse

As I head off to enjoy the Hogmanay celebrations it’s time to bring the 2008 blog to an end.
Looking back on the year it was a good one overall. No-one got hurt. Nobody died. We had several achievements as a family. I continued to pay the bills. Barrack Obama got into power.
My blog has hit 340,000 views in the year. Considering I only had 31,000 in 2007 that represents reasonable progress. I hope you enjoy it. And those of you who read but never comment, come on, open up a bit in 2009.
The Hibees were a joke in 2008. Very dissapointing in many ways, in fact Scottish football, full stop, came crashing back to earth after the heady highs of season 2007/8. Our clubs in Europe were pitiful and they became unrequired viewing the more the season progressed. Celtic are unbelievably bad and yet they are easily the best team in this country. God help us.
As The Hibees set off in pusuit of the Scottish cup for the 106th time since we last succeeded we face Hearts in Round 3. That could be a momentous occassion and who’s to say we won’t do it, after all we only EVER play good football when we are up against it. Last week against Kilmarnock totally summed Hibs’ season up… 2 – 2 at half time at home against only 10 men and we lose 4 – 2. That’s unprofessional.
Work was very rewarding and I enjoyed helping out Pete and Iain at 60 Watt in particular, in tough times it has to be said. I also won fabulous projects from PoppyScotland and The Black Watch. My work with the SMA was challenging but I’m pleased with the way it has developed. I suppose the event I led at Parliament in March has to be a professional highlight, but working on behalf on the industry can be soul destroying when people back off. I also did a lot of work with Golley Slater for which I am very grateful and ended the year with a hatrick of new commissions for stv, Ampersand (a stable of Advocates – yes indeed) and Whitespace. During the year I also enjoyed projects with Corporation Pop, as a mentoring programme for nmp, and have been asked to do more work with them in 2009. Story, Spider Online and Graphic Partners also gave me work in 2008 for which I am extremely grateful
I was delighted to be made a board director of The Lyceum in September and have taken on a fundraising role for FCT as well as taking part in the FAT Christmas show and rehearsing the 2009 Easter Show which is a ‘Best of FCT’ over their first 30 years. It promises to be simply stunning. I’m also chair of the Ferry Fringe but it is proving difficult to really get this rolling for 2009 despite the commitment of a small core of volunteers. Watch this space.
However, on a sad note, the demise of 1576, the company I co-founded, in February was a real shock and a truly sad moment. I’m glad to report that all who sailed in her appear to be in gainful employment and moving on; including both David and Adrian.
I’ve already crowed about my golf in 2008 which was my best ever and I really enjoyed it. I threw far fewer clubs about but still had my moments.
Amy’s Highers Grade results were very good and she was unlucky to miss out on her English which is focussing her mind as we go into 2009. We’re all desperately hoping she’ll get into Duncan of Jordanstone to study Art and she’s taking a Portfolio Course at Telford to help in that ambition. Here’s hoping.
Tom’s golf continued to improve and his handicap overtook mine during the year as he went from 21 to 15. He also got a hole in one in August, something I’ve never done, and won quite a few medals – but none of Ratho’s ‘majors’. I’m hoping that when he gets to 14, as he surely will, he will play against me in the men’s medals at Dundas Park. That’ll be really exciting
If he is not an Olympic Champion at X Box 360 by now he ought to be as he has put in unstinting effort. Shame we can’t say the same about his homework.
Ria continued to improve in her gymnastics but the elusive merit continued to evade her, still, she did master the bridge kick over at last and she was brilliant in Perth in November when her first vault was amazing (we’ll overlook the second one shall we?) She works really hard does Ria and that is showing up in really great results and a huge bunch of really nice friends. She deserves them because she is such a genuine young person.
Jeana won yet another award for South Queensferry in the Summer’s Britain in bloom competition with a Highly Recommended award. The village continues to progress under the Greenferry team’s amazing dedication. She also started her own blog which you can find here and whooped with joy about two weeks ago when she got her first ever comment. She’s not far short of her 1,000th view so get reading.
I had a sloppy evening at Cath’s 80th that constituted the Bad Hair Day of the year.

In books Cormac McCarthy’s The Road simply blew me away and was my favourite read.
In music it had to be Dig Lazarus Dig by Nick Cave but I am growing increasingly interested in African Music and Amadou and Mariam’s new album, Welcome to Mali, is lovely. But check out Je Pense a Toi and Dimanche A Bamacko too (the latter is stunning and their best to date).
And my movie of the year? Not my busiest ever year at the movies so it’s hard to choose a best but I guess it was going to be No Country For Old Men (also based on a Cormac McCarthy book) until Hunger (by Steve McQueen) came along. A really outstanding and breathtaking movie.
TV show of the year? I loved Gavin and Stacey, but my most anticipated show each week was Later with Jools Holland which seemed to find a much more interesting mix this year than of late.
Best theatrical experience, amongst many, was my cousin Susan’s show at The Traverse; Nobody Will ever Forgive Us, which was a stunner.
My gadget of the year was unquestionably the sublime Canon G9, what a wonderful wee camera this is. I also got myself a much more muscular beast – a Canon EOS 400D which is fab too and this has been reflected in my continued devotion to Flickr. I love Flickr. Undoubtedly my find of the year on Flickr was Snailbooty. I mean, look what he just posted today. How good is that?

My man of 2008, was unquestionably Barrack Obama.
Best day out was Alton Towers in the pissing rain in July. It rocked.
Result of the year? Terry got the all clear from his cancer and joined me at the School BBQ in June.
Wife of the year? Jeana Gorman. Again.
Put it this way. I couldn’t live with me. Still.
And so to 2009.
My hopes?
Hibees win the Scottish Cup. (LOL. That is so stupid.)
Tom gets down to a 10 handicap.
Tiger Woods comes back and kicks ass. It wasn’t the same without him.
I win something, anything, at Dundas Park
Amy gets into D of J. (And enjoys it.)
I am healthy throughout.
The FCT 30th Anniversary show is as good as I hope it will be.
The credit crunch doesn’t ruin everything for everyone.
Filed under: golf, humour, life, Scotland, sports, stories | Tags: drumoig, ladybank, St andrews, the dukes
It’s the annual South Queensferry boys outing this weekend in St Andrews. Three very testing courses lie in wait; Drumoig, St Andrews -The Dukes and Ladybank. The chances of topping the 24 in our party are remote to say the least. But I shall, as ever, make an effort.
Hey ho.
Filed under: golf, jokes, life, Rants, Scotland, sports, stories | Tags: Colin Montgomery, faldo, garcia, golf, irish golf, nick faldo, paul azinger, ryder, ryder cup, ryder cup captain, stenson, us v europe
My mate Tony says Europe has no chance and for one fundamental reason…the team hates Faldo. That’s good enough for me.
Oh, and the Yanks love AZ.
That is another scary factor against us.
I’ll be wagering on US for a big win but for Sergio to stand proud (4, or more, not decided yet, points).
You read it here.
What’s more…
It’s in America
They’re better than us.
We’ve had a good run. (And it has to end some time.)
They hate us.
Darren Clarke got snubbed by Faldo.
And so did, love him or hate him, the second best Ryder Cup Player of all time…Colin Montgomery.
For the record Faldo hates him.
Filed under: family, golf, life, photography, Scotland, sports, stories | Tags: Dunfermline Building Society, Dunfermline Building Society Junior Masters Gol, Junior Golf in Scotland, Junior masters Golf, Masters Golf, Scottish Golf, Scottish Junior Masters, sgu, sgu junior masters
Tom qualified for the Scottish Junior Masters second round at Ratho Park today and here’s a few shots to remember the occassion by.
All in all a great experience and a good solid performance with 35 points in the Stableford. Didn’t quite qualify for the final at Gleneagles but he is still only 13. Good on you Tom.
Filed under: family, golf, humour, life, Scotland, sports, stories, Uncategorized | Tags: golf, hole in one, ratho, ratho park
Yup. They sure are because in the summer singles final at Ratho this afternoon Tom hada hole in one at the eighth.
Unfortunately he lost the match and to make matters worse I caned him and my Brother in Law at The Merchants this evening. More on that later.
For now though, well done Tom for your hole in one. I’ve never had one.
Filed under: family, golf, life, Scotland, sports | Tags: golfers, ratho park, ria and mia
Tom and I caned the Rough brothers at Ratho yesterday. I was 5 under par for the first nine holes and we were 5 up. Second half was tougher. They came back but they had to admit they simply weren’t good enough for the Gorman Guys. We won 2 and 1 in the end.
I found out that their niece is Mia Gorman and our daughter is Ria Gorman. Spookkee!
A golf weekend like few others.
Not only did Tom and I beat our nemeses, The Reids, 3 and 1 on Saturday but I had the distinction of scoring the greatest number of pars in a single round in my life (10) and a net 6 under par score – although I have scored better at Ratho.
Sunday’s medal at Dundas Park was also good. My second best medal score ever, net 70, level par.
(How crap is that though?)
However, this hides the real story which was the fact that I shot 5 under for 16 holes and 5 over for the sixth (which, being a nine hole course I have to play, and can’t, twice).
As usual, Tom and I played out the Holiday Golf Competition for the Algarve Cup; as we fondly call it. Tom, who has smugly been proclaiming his superiority to me of late, got his ass well and truly whipped.
Me 3; Tom 1.
He had his ass tanned at The Braids, Whiteleaf near Princes Risburgh and Thurlestone in Devon. He squeaked his modest victory at Whiteleaf in the first match of the series.
I’m glad to say that I do still officially rock.
Hey Greg Norman, don’t think you’ve got a monopoly on kicking the juniors’ asses.
Filed under: family, golf, humour, life, Scotland, sports, stories | Tags: golf, golf medals, medal
Ahhh.
July.
Perfect golf weather.
Actually it was 9 degrees today and pissing with rain. Tom was engaged at Ratho in the semi-final of the Ratho Juniors handicap matchplay. He beat his opponent 6 and 4. Which is something of a massacre.
Me? I was at Dundas in a medal and after 14 holes was 5 under, knowing that the leader had shot 6 under, in the far better morning weather. Then I shot an 8 at the par 4 15th and a 5 at the par 3 16th to go back to 1 under.
I parred my way in after that.
I could have been a contender, but believe it or not my net 69 was my best EVER medal score.
I’m massively disappointed at my inability to close out, but on the other hand, to play your best ever round after 35 years of trying is reason for celebration.
Slainte.
Filed under: golf, life, sports, stories | Tags: jack niclaus, the golden bear, Tiger, tiger woods, torrey pines, us open
I predicted in January that Tiger Woods would win three of the four majors this year.
I thought the US Open and The Masters were certainties but I was, in a way, pleasantly surprised when Trevor Immelman proved me wrong by being the only person to beat Tiger in The Masters.
So for Tiger to then to go off from Augusta for an invasive knee operation made my prediction look pretty unlikely, given that the US Open was only some 8 weeks later.
Despite the fact that he had not played golf between the two Majors he was still sent off favourite last weekend.
The fact that he won it was remarkable enough. But that he had to play an extra 19 holes (and birdie the 18th on both his 4th and 5th rounds just to stay in the tournament) sets him up as one of the greatest athletes the world has ever seen.
And let’s not be coy about this. He is an athlete.
And a very brave man. He was in agony throughout this tournament and yet still went on to win his 14th Major; three years ahead of Niclaus.
Oh, it’s exciting, so exciting, watching history being set (in slow motion).
Filed under: golf, humour, jokes, life, photography, Scotland, sports | Tags: arran, Corrie, lamlash, shiskine
My annual golf trip to Arran, two weeks ago, was a curate’s egg. Good in places. In fact I shot my best ever scores on Corrie, Lamlash (76) and Shiskine (81) and won the 4th and 6th rounds.
However, I was docked a stroke for coming second last year so played off 16 (two below my handicap) meanwhile Wee Bobby got a four stroke raise for playing like Stevie Wonder meets John Merrick for the last three years.
Trouble is, he played like Sevvy Ballesteros for two rounds and despite his colonic syphilitis (or something) hung on to play five rounds. He was coming back to the field like nobody’s business, but his first round five under par was enough to win the day.
I came in a respectable second, three adrift with a pile up in and around me for the places.
Had I have played off my national I’d have won by miles but hey, that’s goilf.
Good on ya Bobby.
Did I tell you he’s 73?
Filed under: golf, humour, jokes, life, Scotland, sports, stories | Tags: arran, golf
“Fingers twitch over keyboard.
Mind wanders off to the wilderness of Arran.
As the prospect of conflict weighs heavy.
On the soul.
Bring it on.
The Auchrannie Quaich.
To the victor. The spoils.”
Yes. I’m off in search of the trophy. Shame I’m so bad at golf.
I will, of course, win best dressed man.
Filed under: golf, humour, life, sports, stories | Tags: bad weather, dundas parks, golf, golf in the rain, greensomes, lightning, rain
This was the scene that greeted us on the first at Dundas Parks Golf Course today as we teed up for the Club championship doubles.
Frankly, it was uninviting.
But we didn’t hesitate. Twice we had to come off the course as the lightning pelted the course left right and centre. But the game must go on.
And, sure, it rained a bit.
A lot actually.
Like Gladiators. myself and Dick Whittock, a nice older guy from Kirkliston (known locally as Cheesetown) built up a two hole advantage, ground out over the first ten holes only to play like a couple of fannies on the 11th to go back to one up.
By the 13th it was all square as Trevor Jones sank putt after putt. And his playing partner, Douglas was rock solid throughout.
And level was how it remained until the 17th when they snuck into the lead. The damage was done. A half on the 18th meant dreams of trophy lifting in the Greensomes will have to wait until 2009.
Bummer.
Filed under: football, golf, Hibees, humour, jokes, life, Rants, Scotland, sports, stories | Tags: Craig Levien, crap refs, Dodgy decisions, Dodgy refs, Dundee Utd, game fixing, Hbees, jambos, Mike McCurry, RangersFC, refereeing, Referees, Scottish Football, Who's the bastard in the black
This is brilliant. Click on the interview panel on the BBC sports page at this link.
Craig Levien, Dundee Utd’s manager, letting off steam after losing a crucial game to Rangers today. Now, when I say letting off steam I mean totally losing it. I like and respect Craig Levien – even if he is a Jambo – and I know exactly how he must feel
And oh what joy to find this old school photo of him on google…
And this one…
Yes, that’s right. It is yours truly on the left. A vision in black. And not overly gaylordish.
Now, we all know that referees favour Celtic and Rangers, but according to Levien, Mike McCurry’s performance today was nothing short of a scandal. He calls him a cheat – which will get him in big trouble with the numpties that run our game – but he is almost certainly right. I haven’t seen the incidents in question, but judging from this outburst I think he probably has a point.
Listening to discussion about it on Five Live’s 606-phone in a Rangers fan brushed it off by saying…
“They’re getting all excited about this one game. Maybe if they’d tried this hard all season against lesser teams this would be less of an issue.”
A neat body swerve I have to say, but, you know what? Totally true!
And that applies to every other team in this shitty league.
And Hibs are no exception.
They turn up for the old firm and Hearts matches and don’t bother their arses against the likes of Aberdeen, Motherwell, St Mirren…
That’s why I don’t go along any more.
Filed under: family, golf, life, photography, Scotland, sports, stories | Tags: dunfermline building society junior masters, golf, junior golf, sgu
Great golf week for Tom.
First off he was playing at number three in the team match at the weekend against a six handicapper (Tom’s off 21) and they play off scratch in these matches. Nevertheless, he halved the match having missed a putt from a foot to win. Doh!
Then yesterday he won the first medal of the season (he won three last year at Ratho and three at Dundas, plus another two prizes). The good thing was this medal was also the qualifier for the Dunfermline Building Society sponsored SGU Scottish Junior Masters.
He might now be cut to 19. I’m 18. Yikes!
Filed under: family, golf, life, Scotland, sports | Tags: golf sensation, masterclass, tiger woods, unbeatable, winning
May I introduce you to the Tiger Woods of South Queensferry?
One tournament played in the 2008 season.
One victory.
Yes, I am that good. I may have a late developing career as a professional golfer because today I, dear reader, won the opening day Texas Sramble at Dundas Parks with my team members, Paul, Calum, Trisha and Ewan.
In a nine hole contest we shot six pars and three birdies which, after deducting our handicap of ten, gave us a net score of 22 (13 under par)..
Tiger. When did you last shoot 13 under par?
Tom had to sit watching (total loser) as we walked elegantly and dignified to the stage to receive our trophy. A bottle of Scotmid Red Wine and six quid.
Whoo hoo.







































