Filed under: Arts, creativity, gigs, humour, jokes, life, politics, Rants, Scotland, swearing | Tags: Scottish Independence, alex salmond, rant, kraftwerk, http www youtube, UKIP, Nigel Farage, Glastonbury 2-13 T in the Park 2013
I love these and I’ve done a few now.
This one’s about Nigel Farage. Known locally as a Nigel Cockend.
But this one’s rather more sympathetic. It’s a Kraftwerk rant.
Filed under: creativity, cycling, life, politics, Rants, science, Scotland, stories | Tags: drug cheats in sport, In pursuit of Lance Armstrong, lance armstrong drug cheat, Lyceum Edinburgh David Walsh, The Lyceum
David Walsh is nothing like the pompous, arrogant Sunday Times sportswriter that you might imagine sportswriters for aggressive newspaper groups in search of the scalp of the world’s greatest sports cheat, Lance Armstrong, might be.
David Walsh is a man whose son died in a cycling accident, coincidentally, aged 12 yet went on to be a great lover of cycling, and sport in general.
Tonight, in Britain’s most beautiful theatre (The Lyceum in Edinburgh) Walsh, acknowledging its humbling beauty, told the story of how he went out to get the lying cheat that is Lance Armstrong. And won.
It was an epic tale presented without a single note and narrated for over an hour.
And it pressed every one of my “Why Lance Armstrong is unforgivable buttons.”
Walsh eloquently argued why Armstrong not only used his cancer as both “a shield and a sword” but that his use of Growth Hormones before his diagnosis probably accelerated its invasiveness.
He made reference to the many, many people that Armstrong inhumanely took out, completely ruthlessly, in pursuit of the self preservation of his entirely false achievements.
He defended Sky and Wiggins as doggedly as he vilified US Postal and Armstrong.
And he did it all calmly, reflectively, convincingly, powerfully.
Please God. Tell me Walshy’s not on EPO.
Filed under: Arts, creativity, politics | Tags: david ayer, end of watch, jake Gylenhall, la crimme scenre, michael pena, Studio canal
I wasn’t expecting all that much having turned up for a mid Monday afternoon showing of a cop movie by a director I didn’t know.
Mid November. The Auditorium was nearly full! I was taken aback. And then perhaps 2012′s movie of the year unfolded. (A good starting point was that it was Studio Canal funded. I always like that.)
What follows is 2 hours of engrossing cinema without peer this year. The relationship between Jake Gylenhall and Michael Pena has to be seen to be believed (it maybe even challenges that of Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Joaquim Pheonix in the Master). It has similarities to The Master in that the plot is, at best, loose but it matters less here because one is so utterly absorbed in the unfolding relationship between the white and Latino “brothers” and “heroes” that Gylenhall and Pena become.
The movie is episodic. Each building the picture of two committed cops who live for the badge but have a life beyond it. And set in a horrifying community of black and Hispanic (specifically Mexican) warfare and bad Mutha’s. (If bad language offends you I’d give this movie a swift sidestep.)
Shot hand held, with a slightly ropey reasoning for this, it feels as real as a documentary and that’s really the strength behind it. Because you are drawn into the characters’ reality. A reality that revolves around a range of truly harrowing day to day high(low)lights to buddy chat that’s hilarious in a South Central LA that is scary. Real scary because the bad ass men (and women) in this movie are baaaad aaaaass.
It’s brilliantly directed from the off by David Ayer (better known as a writer) and the early scene in which Gylenhall and Pena cruise the streets of LA to the soundtrack, super-loud, of Public Enemy’s “Harder than you Think” really does set the scene.
Later, but early in the development, the boys do a raid on a house, seemingly innocent, the discovery (one of many) that follow actually chills the blood. It’s a jaw dropping moment. And one I won’t forget in a long time . And what’s more, it felt like you were there in the building with them.
This is great movie making. Completely shocking, utterly beguiling. Hard and yet soft. Loving yet hateful.
It’s 2012′s Drive without the gloss.
It’s a 9/10 must see.
Filed under: business, conservative, creativity, liberal, life, politics, Rants, Uncategorized | Tags: Barack Obama, democrats, ethnic vote, mitt romney, politics, republicans, The 2012 US presidential election
When Barack Obama rode into power in November 2008 on a wave of optimism, change, belief, creativity and downright sexiness the world gasped. American politics had not been so riveting since the 1960′s and certainly not as glamorous. This online ad encapsulated it all for me.
And then reality kicked. The mother of all recessions and hostile antipathy towards what’s now known as Obamacare.
One of Mitt Romney’s central strategies was, in creating 12million new jobs (really?), he would revoke Obamacare and return America to the most obviously polarised class structure in the Western world.
Obama meanwhile was criticised for continuing the Afghan war and for appearing remote; too much a thinker, not enough a baby-hugger.
He was doomed.
Five things saved him I believe. Catching, and killing, Bin Laden (in a brave and high risk operation), Hurricane Sandy, Clinton’s speech, his wife and a brilliantly single-minded and principled political agenda that reached out Liberally to the WHOLE of America.
While Romney seduced the white vote with constant appeals to their pockets “it’s the economy stupid.” Obama consistently ploughed his furrow of social justice.
The Democrats are painted as Socialists (albeit dressed in Blue) but they strike me, under Obama, as the world’s great Liberals, balancing vote winning (in the underpriveleged) social issues with strong foreign affairs and a balanced view on the economy; it’s not the economy at ALL costs.
This chart said it all when I saw it last week. It demonstrated what a danger Romney would be given the keys to the White House (we all saw his ineptitude abroad earlier this year in the UK)
The statistics are overwhelming and, guess what, the only country favouring Romney was Pakistan; default home of Al Quaeda. World, we got a close call here but escaped unharmed.
Obama’s return to power was anything but certain. He had to rely on a strong ethnic vote (and his ethnicity unquestionably helped there – were a white candidate standing against Romney the result would probably have been very different. Should Hilary Clinton choose to stand in 2016 her support amongst female voters may have a similiar effect). He had to scrap on the streets of the swing states for his life. He only performed moderately in the TV debates. He was saved in the end by his sticking to principles but his negative campaigning was far removed from the elegance of the Obey campaign.
This TV ad from last month though was a masterclass in Liberal balanced communication and I hope it made its mark. There were so many that one will never know and it seems it was the doorstep canvassing that really made the difference. Obama’s strategy in micro-marketing being better and more energetic.
A note on the TV coverage. I watched it here, in the UK, flipping between the BBC, Sky, CNBC and CNN. By a country mile the most interesting, insightful and challenging coverage came from CNN.
The BBC was plodding and boring.
So, America has made a brave, some might say, and reasoned, others might say, judgement call. At the end of an administration that has see the economy hit by its very own Hurricane Sandy and against a presentable and domestically credible conservative voice offering the promise of a return to “The American Dream” Obama has held on, scraped back into power and given the opportunity to carry on his work, Not only that but The Senate surprisingly remained in the hands of the Democrats.
One major blot on the horizon; the Republicans still hold power in the house and so the opportunity to quash social change policies remains real and present.
One word sums it up again though.
I’m Mark Gorman and I approved this message.
Filed under: advertising, creativity, politics | Tags: entertainment, Girls, Lena Dunham, obama, Obama ads, Presidential campaign 2012, tv star
It’s an interesting and tightly targeted ad albeit presented slightly patronisingly by US TV star, Lena Dunham; creator and star of the excellent “Girls”.
Filed under: creativity, humour, jokes, politics, Rants, Youtube | Tags: daily reckless, kelvinmackenzie, Tommy Mackay
See more of Tommy’s unique brand of humour here
Filed under: politics, Rants | Tags: Big man, northampton, Old lady armed robbery, Old lady jewel heist, Old lady justice, Rough justice, scotfail, scotrail, The law is an ass, train assault
How come the “Big Guy” in this video is vilified in many circles for stepping in and sorting out a situation and risks losing his job when all he has done is sort out a wee nyaff that delighted the onlookers..
But this old lady, who stepped in and sorted out a situation becomes a national treasure when all she has done is sort out a bunch of wee nyaffs that delighted the onlookers.
For the record I think the “Big Man” did everyone on that train a favour and should be lauded.
The Scotfail guard summed the company up quite nicely.
Filed under: creativity, humour, jokes, life, politics, sports, Uncategorized | Tags: Good for the Jews, It's good to be a Jew at Christmas
I heard this on Huey, from the Fun Lovin’ Criminals’, 6 Music Show this afternoon.
Filed under: creativity, humour, politics | Tags: obama, trump obama v trumop Correspondents dinner in washington
Fantastic clip from an Obama speech in April this year in which he has a go at Donald Trump (aka Dickhead) after he’d questioned Obama’s African roots.
To get him back he released not only his birth certificate but his birth VIDEO too.
Filed under: humour, politics, Rants | Tags: returning officer fail, scottish elections
The returning officer has little to do other than count a few bits of paper and tell folk the outcome. However I feel a good returning officer has a duty to do so with good presentational skills.
Here are a few examples from last night of good protocol.
The first is near perfection height management, as you’d expect, from Edinburgh. The RO herself has modestly taken her place out of centre shot.
In this one the Glaswegians show a thorough understanding of the exposition of the craft.
This would have been excellent had the RO not spoiled it all by putting his titchy wee self in the middle. And the guy on the right was too busy preening to make a really great exposition.
Although creating beautiful “form” this RO from Falkirk mucks it up by taking centre stage.
Here is a good example of returning officer FAIL. Although the numbers are good and the overall effect is reasonable the guy in the white shirt four from the right and the white haired bloke both totally ruin the RO’s efforts.
The wifey in the ginger wig is also a major aberration. Not only is she out of height synch. She’s too far forward and she’s clapping like a performing monkey.
If you were Scottish I hope you were voting for a historic moment.
Sadly half of you couldn’t be arsed getting yourself down to your nearby polling station.
Those of us that could be bothered contributed to the sending of one of the most vocal messages in the history of this fantastic nation’s politics.
To see the Liberal vote collapse was not all that surprising given Nick Clegg’s appalling act of virtual treason by bedding with the Antichrists.
But for the Labour vote to fail to materialise so spectacularly in the face of this ripe political climate (for them) is far more remarkable.
Part of the reason for that was Iain Gray’s utterly hapless presidential performance in the face of a tour de force by Alex Salmond.
This is a MONUMENTAL result.
It is absolutely jaw dropping because the whole voting structure in Scotland, designed by Labour, was intended to keep the SNP out of power.
Not only has it failed to do that but it has returned what political experts deemed impossible. An overall majority in a PR chamber.
I doubt we will ever see a day as dramatic in politics again in my lifetime.
I doubt Iain Gray will see the week out as Labour leader in Scotland.
I doubt many people will see anything like as effete a collaboration in Liberal Democratic clothes as Nick Clegg and Tavish Scott in their lifetimes. (Total amateurism. Tavish Scott made Iain Gray look almost workmanlike at times.)
I doubt we will vote for Scottish independence.
Filed under: football, jokes, politics, Rants, Scotland, sports | Tags: Scottish Football Association, SFA
“Lennon is currently serving a four game suspension imposed earlier in the season and will sit out the second of those games against Inverness Caledonian Thistle on Wednesday night. It was widely believed that the fresh punishment would take effect when the current ban was completed but Celtic’s statement confirms that they do not believe that to be the case.
Taking into account the SFA’s rules and the date the most recent ban was imposed, Celtic are claiming that both suspensions will be served simultaneously from this point on, meaning their manager will be in the stands for four more matches including the Inverness game and not a further six as would be the case if suspensions were served consecutively.”
I am not jumping on the anti-Lennon bandwagon, I simply can’t be bothered and I do have sympathy for the way he is treated in his private life. No, this is all about the SFA and their continuous bottling it. If Lennon has erred his sentences should not be commuted, like the last one was or run simultaneously. No wonder Celtic are not appealing. If they did even a commuted sentence would begin after the current one.
It’s a farce.
Filed under: Arts, creativity, humour, liberal, life, politics, Scotland, theatre | Tags: Edinburgh, Edinburgh Theatre, entrepreneurialism, female entrepreneurs, lesbian love, lesbian relationships, lesbians, Scottish Theatre, stellar quines, the age of arousal, the emancipation of women, The Lyceum, the remington typewritter, The Royal Lyceum, The royal lyceum theatre company, the sexual revolution, victorian britain, women and work, women's liberation
Just as Stanley Townsend playing Eddie Carbone frequently accused Rodolpho to be “not right, just not right” in the previous Lyceum production of A View From The Bridge, so a central plank of Muriel Romanes’ joint production with The Lyceum and Stellar Quines is the notion of homosexuality that cannot be said by it’s name; here Lesbian ladies are merely “odd”. But it amounts to the same.
In “A View” Rodolpho’s homosexuality was imagined by Eddie as a construct with which to castigate his foe; here it is a celebration of the two lead characters, Rhoda Nunn and Mary Barfoot who despite being a generation apart in age are Victorian entrepreneurs with a taste for each other as more than just business partners.
This could have made for a truly shocking dramatic premise but it’s shrugged off as “odd”, perhaps, but really nothing to get one’s knickers in a twist about.
Although I said previously ‘Our two leads’ this is in actual fact as ensemble a show as one could imagine, they are backed by a chorus of gaggling Macbethian sisters played outstandingly by Alexandra Mathie (truly amazing) and Molly Innes as the older, hopeless spinsters and Hannah Donaldson as the “pretty” sibling with a chance.
“Overbred” by 500,000, out of a population of two million, Victorian Britain needed women to look good if they were to have any chance in a male buyers’ market and the only two women in our cast of six that would have any chance are “pretty” Monica Madden and committed Dyke, Roda Dunn. The fact that they both fall for the same man makes for intriguing developments as the play unfolds, and surrounded by six women of exquisite talent Jamie Lee as Everard Barfoot has his work cut out to fly the flag for us blokes. That he succeeds with panache, wit and charm is testimony to his excellent performance.
This is a play that is richly and deeply textured; interestingly realised with beautifully subtle sound, video and lighting design and costumes (designed in a third year project by Edinburgh School of Art Students) that for me were the best I’ve seen on the Lyceum stage in a long time. Interestingly, my wife hated them. I’m so much more in touch with my feminine side it would seem.
This is an absorbing two hours of entertainment with a feisty and often hilarious script that batters along holding you firmly in its thrall throughout.
It’s a gem.
And it’s a real thought piece too; at its centre is the debate over the role that “work” played in liberating women from the shackles of domesticity. The arrival of the Remington typewriter to UK shores, and made centrepiece of this show, both physically and stylistically is a clear metaphor for women’s emancipation. But is it all good? Has it served its function. After all, by the 1960′s the typewriter was the focus for feminist ire as it had created exactly the opposite effect that this late 19th century passport to freedom so obviously delivered.
Motherhood and child rearing is examined too, suggesting that perhaps domesticity is not so bad. But in the play it’s wrapped up in sexuality and the power women (still) hold over hapless men who can’t see further than the end of that organ that so drives so many of us.
It’s complex indeed (just look at the number and variety of tags I’ve used in this post). And I’m not sure you’ll get all the answers or unravel all the themes in one sitting Certainly it’s more than worthy of second helpings. So, go, indulge yourself and maybe you’ll be back for more.
Filed under: Arts, creativity, humour, jokes, life, politics, Rants, stories | Tags: bill grundy, bill grundy and the sex pistols, phil adams, phil adams sawdust blog, sawdust, swear, swearing, swearword censorship, swearwords, the express, the guardian
I am indebted to my friend Phil Adams for making me think about this subject, of which my regular readers will know I am very fond. This morning he wrote a brilliant and highly amusing post on his excellent blog, Sawdust. It’s about an issue that makes my blood boil. The lame-assed censorship of swearing, in the media.
Take this example from last month’s Times (One of the worst offenders as it happens)…
“Student rioters were incensed as they charged on Whitehall. Said one, ‘the f***ing coalition are a bunch of c***s.’ ”
OK, I actually made that up but it’s a typical sentence you might read any day in any quality newspaper; except the Guardian who would have literally reported the quote.
Do they think we are complete idiots, that we can’t work out what letters the asterisks replace.
In his post Adams beautifully argues that this is in fact a form of reverse psychology, it’s a stopper, because it actually brings MORE attention to the swearword. You re-read it, maybe even saying “fucking” out loud and if you’re a reader of the Daily Mail or Express you might even write in outrage to the editor.
Why not paraphrase the quote or leave it out altogether if swearing is such a challenge to your sensitivities?
And while I’m on it why does the Sun think it’s OK to show a picture of a topless girl next to a paragraph (headline even) that reads “It’s all a load of b*ll*cks.”? Which is most offensive to the greater number of people? I mean, Jesus Christ, Rodney and Dell Boy said bollocks repeatedly on prime time TV for years, so I’m pretty sure it’s not even a swear word. OK it’s a step up from my Grandmother’s old favourite: Ruddy. But I have seen Bollocks b*ll*cked up many times in the red tops.
This is one of my all time favourite poems which elucidates my point to perfection.
This was the moment that changed the history of swearing on TV. I mean it’s hilarious. The juxtaposition of posh old Bill Grundy and the trying oh so hard Sex Pistols…
It’s all captured beautifully in this book I received for Christmas. I read it whenever I sit on the sh*tter.
Let’s return to the Guardian; where others write *rse (I kid you not) or trail Tarantino’s movie as Inglorious B******’s the Guardian will happily go for the full Bhuna. No one is afraid of the swearie police at the Guardian and that’s one of the reasons I love it so. Don’t like it? Don’t buy it. Just like you are, or aren’t, reading this post this far.
So, that’s that off my chest. I can go and make the f****g breakfast now.
Filed under: family, life, politics, Rants, stories | Tags: 2010, 2011, 60 watt, Arcade fire, Band of joy, Belle and Sebastian, best books 2010, best music 2010, best of 2010, best theatre 2010, canon 450D, Cee Lo Green, Courage of others, david peace, Edinburgh, electronic music, fct, german music, Hibees, Hibs, I am Kloot, iPad, John Grant, john hughes, krautrock, lyceum, lyceum theatre, madmen, Midlake, Nick Clegg, nmp, pailgap, queen of denmark, red riding, red riding quadrilogy, Robert Plant, Rumer, Scotland, St Columba's hospice, stv, the apprentice, the red riding books, The suburbs, tories, tory idiots, usability lab
Not a bad vintage actually.
Work wise I was run off my feet once again and almost literally in December which proved to be extraordinarily challenging due to the shitness of the weather and the fact that I was researching all over the country. It was a real struggle, very stressful indeed.
Some great clients which include STV, Ampersand, Corporation Pop, 60 Watt, nmp and LA Media from last year. But added a few too including Gill’s Cruise Centre, Paligap, and The Usability Lab.
My golf stank pretty much from start to finish and I had a poor Arran and a poor St Andrews. However one highlight was an Eagle 3 on the par 5 second in the club championships first round. I won that but went out in round two. However Forty years of failing to Eagle were finally over. (Tom got about 6 last year alone).
Musically it was a big return to form after very poor shows in both 2008 and 2009.
I’ve already posted my tracks of the year elsewhere which will give you an idea of my top ten albums, but for the record, these are they…
I’m New Here by Gil Scott Heron
Band of Joy by Robert Plant
The Courage of Others by Midlake
Queen of Denmark by John Grant
The Suburbs by The Arcade Fire
Sky at Night by I am Kloot
Elektonische Music Experiment – German Rock and Electronic Music 1972 – 1983
Write About Love by Belle and Sebastian
The Lady Killer by Cee Lo Green
Seasons of my Soul by Rumer
My blog had a record year, just, with 340,000 hits, up 45,000 on last year and beating 2008 by only 1,000. As a result I hit the million mark last week and raised over £1,000 for St Columba’s Hospice in the process. Thanks to all who contributed.
I did two music quizzes (one in Edinburgh and one in Manchester) for NABS and these raised £3,500
The Hibees were a farce from year start to end and our Scottish cup hopes look less plausible than for a very long time. Looks like we’ll be going at least 110 years before winning it again.
Theatre again played a big part in my year.
My role as a director of The Lyceum developed and I thought Mark Thomson had a vintage year. Every show was a hit in some form or other and the highlights for me were The Beauty Queen of Leenane, Confessions of a Justified Sinner, The Price and The Importance of Being Earnest.
FCT had another good year, my first at the helm and I’d like to thank the fab committee for their support. Two great shows in Just So and Guys and Dolls and another ENDA award. Annie’s next but no decision yet on the festival. Our away day in October was deemed a great success.
Amy started at Uni and is working hard as she has done all year at Dakota. She bought a virtually new car herself ( a Toyota Yaris) and I was really proud of her for being so focussed to be able to do this. Ria is working hard at school and did really well in her standard grades. Tom isn’t and didn’t.
Tom’s golf continued to improve and his handicap went from 11 to 7.
Sadly Jeana’s blossoming work at Suntrap came to an end when the funding was pulled. She was devastated and I suspect still is.
We holidayed in California and it was a tram smash of a holiday from start to finish, summed up by this video…
In books I didn’t read much. I am enjoying Freedom by Jonathon Franzen but the best of the year was the Red Riding Quadrilogy by David Peace.
And my movie of the year? Well, I saw over 20 movies at the flicks this year and a lot of real quality. But I plump for The Social Network. A Prophet was great as was Monsters and The Road, but David Fincher surpassed himself with an amazing script by Aoron Sorkin.
TV show of the year? No Question. Mad Men (we’re playing catch up and only nearing end of season two but it’s fabulous).
In reality TV The Apprentice continues to kick ass.
Digital gizmo of the year? My iPad… but also my Canon 450 D. An up and down year on the camera front but happy with my lot and looking for a Canon 5D Mk 1 and a new 28mm prime lens to move on a level in 2011.
Idiot of the Year? Won hands down by Nick Clegg. Only cos he sold his soul to the devil. But he was run close by those fools that lead our government. You know who they are. Tony Blair continued to make a right fucking dick of himself and the legacy of Kenny Macaskill is not away yet with Magrahi in the rudest of health.
Sadly I lost a number of friends during the year; Myles, Kathy and Jim, I’ll miss you all. God bless and love to all of your families.
Wife of the year? Jeana Gorman. 21st year running. How can she bear it?
Put it this way. I couldn’t live with me. Still.
And so to 2011.
Hibees win the Scottish Cup. (That’s just stupid. Ed.)
Tom gets down to a 4 handicap.
I win something, anything, at Golf.
The kids do well at school and uni.
I am healthy throughout. (And lose rather a lot of weight.)
Both Cath and Jean stay healthy too
The credit crunch doesn’t get worse again.
Filed under: advertising, Arts, business, creativity, humour, jokes, life, photography, politics, stories | Tags: harrods, harrods disgruntled employee, harrods firing, harrods fuck off
I love this story, I really do.
A guy was fired from the toy dept of Harrods last week. So hacked off was he that after drinking nearly two bottles of whisky he managed to get himself into the control room that operates the outdoor lights dispaly (10,000 of the beggars).
He then changed the display to reflect his feelings.
Sweet.Read the full story here.
Filed under: Arts, creativity, family, humour, life, politics, stories | Tags: Annette benning, Gay mums, holywood, Julianne moore, Lesbian marriage, mark ruffalo, The kids are alright
I saw this wonderful movie today at the end of its run. So nothing I say will be news to anyone.
I guess it’s not really broken through because it’s hardly what one could call cine-fashionable. (Apparently it is the first movie ever made about a lesbian marriage in Hollywood.)
That’s interesting because the territory is ripe for humour and pathos in equal measure. And that opportunity is grasped with both hands by writer/director Lisa Chodolenko who frankly appears from nowhere.
She is aided and abetted by a stunning cast. Julianne Moore is magnificent as the “wife” to Annete Benning’s refreshingly unmacho bull dyke dad, both of whom are mom’s to Joni (Mia Wasikowska, last seen in Alice in Wonderland as Alice) and Laser (yes, I know).
I never said this was gonna be easy.
When the kids decide to track down who co created them through their lesbian mom’s Cryobank records they find a Dad that’s cool, sexy and life changing.
Mark Ruffalo has surely never been better in a role that he clearly loves – most particularly when rigorously reintroducing Julianne Moore to the delights of the male body for sexual satisfaction.
The fact that Moore, at 44, is willing to get down and dirty, freckles (millions of them), unfashionable red hair (by Hollywood standards) and all just shows what a great actress she is.
The film gradually develops from light comedy into really insightful and moving reflections on the meaning of family in an ever changing and disposable universe
And the relevance of lesbianism?
It’s just about families, marriage and the unbearable toughness of being.
I found it very inspiring.
Filed under: Arts, books, family, humour, life, politics, Rants, Scotland, stories | Tags: parenthood, parenting, philip larkin, they fuck you up, this be the verse, your mum and dad.
Philip Larkin’s seminal poem, This be the verse, is a cultural icon in the poetry world as it bemoans the difficulty of adolescence.
They fuck you up, your mum and dad. They may not mean to, but they do. They fill you with the faults they had And add some extra, just for you. But they were fucked up in their turn By fools in old-style hats and coats, Who half the time were soppy-stern And half at one another's throats. Man hands on misery to man. It deepens like a coastal shelf. Get out as early as you can, And don't have any kids yourself. Someone I know took a 21st approach on facebook today that made me laugh. I guess I shouldn't have and so I have protected the identity of the individual in question.
Filed under: advertising, business, creativity, humour, jokes, life, politics, Rants, Scotland, stories | Tags: ads, graffitti, posters, stv local
What happens when you run provocative headlines. This is the campaign for the launch of STV local in North Lanarkshire.
Filed under: Arts, creativity, politics | Tags: C4, england, englandshire, shane meadows, this is england, This is england 86
Shane Meadows’ very poignant film set in 1983 was a cracker.
Even blacker than that is the follow up TV series which I was not expecting and has thus become a sudden and unexpected comedy delight.
Part Shameless (sorry, but it has to be said) part Boys from the Black Stuff.
It’s just harsh.
And it’s unforgiving.
Show any of the characters a chink of light and merciless slagging ensues and that makes it feel real. Because that’s the stuff of life is it not? Ripping the piss out of your nearest and dearest. Mercilessly.
The acting is bloody top notch.
It’s not easy looking shite on screen, but most of the cast carry it off with ease.
Special mention has to go to Vicky McLure so far in the Tomboy central love role.
This might turn out to be a classic. It certainly has trapped well.
Filed under: family, life, politics, Rants, Scotland | Tags: Bellahouston Glasgow, Bellahouston Park, Catholic Child Sex abuse, catholic church, catholic faith, child sex abuse scandals, deference, lack of deference, laity, Pope Gregory, Pope Gregory's visit to Scotland, religion, Scottish Catholics, Sex abuse scandals
I was stunned when my mother told me the other day that she would not be going to Bellahouston Park to see Pope Benedict strut his stuff. Her reasoning being that she would not support a pontif who had swept child sex abuse under the carpet.
Now let’s put my astonishment in context here. My mother is a 74 year old, card carrying, lifelong Catholic who practices her religion with devotion several times a week.
For her to ‘disown’ her spiritual leader is, in my book, brave, principled and deeply admirable.
And I am wholly (if you’ll excuse the pun) with her.
I too am a, rather flakier, card holder and I am rather less supportive in general terms of the Catholic church. And, for me, the whole destabilisation of the organisation under Pope Benedict’s custodianship has increasingly looked like a religion losing control.
I strongly agree with this brave writer to The Guardian only last week
If the supreme pontiff wanted to restore the moral credibility of his church, he could do even better than that. He could, as Jesus did, take the sins of his brethren on himself. He could quit, whether personally responsible for the global cover-up that has put Roman Catholicism into an unprecedented crisis or not. That there is no precedent for a papal resignation would make it totally remarkable, even saintly. In secular terms, the holy father would, however, be doing no more than any CEO of an international corporation in a comparably disgraceful situation. He would be forced by his chairman to go. God has abdicated that kind of authority and left even a pope with free will.
There is, as it happens, a recent Protestant precedent. When the Lutheran bishop of Hamburg learned of a serious case of child abuse within her jurisdiction, though not directly responsible, she promptly resigned. Anything less, she said, would not suffice. Perhaps a woman’s moral sensibility is stronger. Were that, per impossibile, to happen at the Vatican, a successor would be set free to embark on the new reformation that would need to centre on vital issues of gender and sexuality.
Brighton, East Sussex
Again, in the Guardian, on Monday, Madeleine Bunting made some interesting observations.
In her article she cited that his clumsiness (to put it mildly) in handling not just child sex abuse, but also female ordination and the church’s relationship with Islam has reignited anti Catholic feeling in the UK. Quite rightly she points to the impact of the child sex abuse scandals in that it strikes at the core of our religion and totally undermines the authority of the clergy over the laity. Deference to the clergy is in freefall. How could it be any other way. “What ye sew, so shall ye reap.”
And yet, and yet, despite collapsing confidence and church attendance all over Europe business is booming.
Africans and Asians are flocking to the church in their droves.
So what? Business is bad in Europe? We can just invest our marketing effort in new markets can’t we?
So what if the old guard lose faith; there plenty more we can get through missionary work.
I don’t want to sound totally cynical, but it’s hard not to. The entire edifice of the Catholic Church is built on faith, blind faith critics argue, and faith is built on trust.
When a 74 year old blind faith follower votes with her feet the whole pack of cards looks in very great danger of falling down.
And it’s so easy to fix.
Zero tolerance needs to be adopted and the church should be utterly cleansed of these men once and for all.
Then, maybe then, Catholicism will find an Indian summer in Europe.
As for Bellahouston Park. I hope it’s half empty.
Filed under: Arts, family, jokes, life, politics, Rants, Scotland, stories, theatre, videos, Youtube | Tags: Edinburgh, Edinburgh Festival, edinburgh festival fring, fct, festival cavalcade, forth childrens theatre, holyrood park
WPC McBulldog dumped all 70 of us FCT members off the back of our float at the end of last Sunday’s Festival Cavalcade, leaving us transportless and facing the long walk back to Bangholm which, in fact Izzie and nine intrepid explorers embarked upon. The rest of us were left to ponder the demise of a tradition of 30 years where we all travel to Holyrood Park (or Princes Street in the old days) on the back of a 40 ft Artic.
So, for those of you who’ve shared the fun, have one last nostalgic look at Cavalcade 2010 starting at Bangholm as we left our spiritual home and later as we took the second of two wrong routes to the start.
It was a hoot.
Filed under: Labour, liberal, life, politics | Tags: 2010 budget, austerity budget, budget, george osborne, tory
So, Gideon takes his first step forward in the adult arena and…he fails to fail.
That was a big surprise to me.
But, credit where it’s due; his first budget was a triumph. Having said that it would be difficult not to have shone in the austerity budget to end all budgets.
What impressed me, aside from the many tedious Labour rhetoric snide criticisms (and the progressive coalition big ups. Ed), was his strategy.
The way I read it is thus, stuff the super-rich (we’ve got them anyway) and let’s really rip into the “Shameless” class, those that really do screw benefits.
I have to say that as a non Daily Mail reader I buy that.
The other thing I agree with is his slowing down of public sector employment growth.
However, there was never an easier time to deliver a swingeing budget and I wonder if he actually missed a trick and could have gone even further. I will also find it amusing to read commentators’ views on the VAT rise. When Darling cut it to 15% nobody said it made a heap of difference…why then is the subsequent rise such a focus on this particular budget?
I confirm, I have not turned right wing, but common sense prevailed today and was presented well.
(Will, I so know you are going to disagree with every word of this.)
Filed under: conservative, humour, Labour, liberal, life, politics, Scotland, stories, UK election | Tags: alex salmon, BBC, leaders debate, SNP
Salmond’s challenging of the SNP’s right to be in the leadership debate is at the very least entertaining and at best an interesting constitutional call. I’m in favour of him winning the court case I have to say.
He has two reasons for justifying his claim;
- He has managed a coalition with little fuss for three years
- He governs 10% of the country
Filed under: conservative, Labour, liberal, life, politics, Rants, UK election | Tags: arran, arran politics, ayrshire, david cameron, gay politics, Philip Lardner, the election, the tories, tory gay gaff, tory prejudice, tory scum, UK election
I read tonight that, and I quote, Philip Lardner, the Tory election candidate for North Ayrshire and Arran, said that most Britons consider homosexuality to be “somewhere between unfortunate and simply wrong” and it should not be supported by the state.
In a section on his website, he supported parents and teachers who do not want children to be taught about homosexuality and churches who do not want to employ gay people.
Philiip Lardner is not really in touch with this century and life in general.
He ought to heed this poster.
Filed under: conservative, Labour, liberal, life, politics | Tags: Democracy, Lib Dem, liberal, there is another way
We’d like to see people who agree with Lib Dem policies actually voting Lib Dem for a change.
“If everyone who’d wanted the Lib Dems to be in power actually voted for them, they’d win” – John Cleese
If you believe in Lib Dem policies, vote for them. Don’t be fooled into thinking you have to vote for which ever ‘Labservative’ party is the lesser of two ev
Filed under: conservative, Labour, politics, stories | Tags: lib dems, liberals, nick cleg, UK election
A Yougov poll today actually had the Libs in the lead.
Surely this is the single most remarkable political ‘happening’ in more than a generation (SNP’s victory in Scotland excluded). Fundamentally we all need to rethink our politics becuase on this basis the Libs become an electable party and I. for one, will be shifting my allegiance back to where it has always been.
It is a great week for politics.
Let’s see if we have the collective national bottle to vote for the only true centre party and get one over on the faux centrists.
Filed under: conservative, Labour, liberal, politics, UK election | Tags: Nick Clegg
I have consistently voted Liberal for years but have reached the stage where I’ve formed the opinion that my brilliant political insightfulness and wisdom is wasted because 20% is the sum total of the electorate that the party can mobilise.
So blow me? This quote from the BBC website nearly knocked me over.
“A Sun newspaper poll, carried out after the TV debate, suggests Labour are in third place on 28% (down 3%), with the Lib Dems on 30% (up 8%) and the Conservatives 33% (down 4%).”
The Liberals up 8%? EIGHT PERCENT?
If this is the case Nick Clegg’s performance on Thursday night (where all agreed he walked the Prime Minister’s debate) might be the most effective political performance in history.
What this poll suggests is that Nick Clegg has single-handedly turned a duopoly into an oligopoly in one fell swoop.
Immediately, if this is true and is sustained, it moves me back to being a Liberal voter because I can see value in the vote.
Immediately it makes the election the most interesting in a century.
Immediately I am very, very excited about this election.
I do so hope I won’t look back on this and think how naive I was to get excited about one poll. In one paper. And The Sun at that.
But maybe, maybe this could just be a snowball effect beginning to form.
The greatest irony?
This poll, which puts Labour in third place, would see them back in power.
Politics. It’s a weirdo.
Filed under: family, jokes, life, politics, Rants, stories | Tags: conservatives, david cameron, trust, wank
Ria, my inquisitive but uninitiated political daughter, spent some time tonight quizzing me on the fundamentals of the upcoming election.
It was very interesting.
I then asked her what she thought.
By a mile Nick Clegg was her party leader of choice and it seems that the ‘Three Leaders’ speech has become a breakthrough moment for the Libs.
But the killer comment was this.
“David Cameron? I wouldn’t trust him with a bag of lettuce”