I nearly wet myself when I read this…

Taken, verbatim from The Times online…

David Cameron was attacked by a white van driver who tried to push him into a car as he cycled home from a dinner late at night.

The van had been following him and was stopping and starting, which made Mr Cameron nervous. “I turned down a road I don’t normally go down, and I slowed down and sort of pulled in behind a line of parked cars,” he reveals in a book out today.

“As this van drove by this hand came out and just bashed me in the back with the aim of pushing me in front of the car. Luckily I managed to put the brakes on.”

The incident happened a few months ago and is recounted in Cameron on Cameron, which is based on conversations that the Conservative leader had with Dylan Jones, the Editor of GQ, over the past year.

Can you imagine the ignominy of being assassinated by a white van man.  I’m crying, literally crying with laughter writing this.

Gosh, he’s so…tough.

Salmond would have run after the gadgey and kicked his heid in.

Him and George Osborne?  Laurel andHardy.

What would the papers have said?

Och, I’ll let you tell me.  I’m off for a rest.

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