Arsehole alert!


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This morning I took a call from a “withheld number”.

After a few seconds delay a foreign sounding chap announced himself be saying “Good morning I am calling from Microsoft organisation and I’m calling you about your computer.”

Now at this point with these unsolicited callers I usually wait for them to ask for Mr Gorman and say “I’ll just get him for you.” then put the phone down and wait for them to hang up.

But he didn’t say that.

He said “are you the main computer user?” to which I replied “no, my husband is.”

He sounded shocked and asked “are you a man or a woman?” to which I replied somewhat indignantly “I’m a man?”.

Quick as a flash he astoundedly asked “Are you a gay?” in quite a high pitched voice.

I responded “are you an arsehole?”

“Fuck off” he replied.

“Fuck you” was my admittedly unsubtle retort.

I don’t remember exactly how he finished the call but included further cursing and general homophobia, at which point he hung up.